10 Ways to Get Out of Prison Legally
Hopefully you never find yourself incarcerated, but what would you do if you did? And what if you had a crappy lawyer? Well, you would want to know all of your options, wouldn’t you? Just in case of rainy legal weather here are ten ways to get out of prison without bucking the system. You never know. They might come in handy someday, God forbid.
1. Fight for It
Literally. In Thailand (and in Western flicks) they actually allow the inmates to fight for their freedom. Westerns may feature boxing matches, but in the world-famous Bangkok Hilton, a prison renowned for overcrowding and inmate deaths, they will often have martial arts competitions, with the possibility of winning competitor’s freedom. You may find baseball or soccer matches serve the same purpose in other prisons.
While this may seem a bit far-fetched for most of us, the fact is that the prisons in Brazil are so overcrowded that violence runs completely rampant. They try to help by providing different types of training for inmates to prepare them for the outside, and in order to speed up the release process, prisoners can earn one day off of their time for every three days of knitting they do.
3. Being a Snitch
While this is something that is heavily shunned by the criminal world, many take advantage of tattle-tailing in order to get either reduced sentences, or to get out of trouble altogether. This is primarily something that takes place in the United States.
In India the prison system is on the verge of total breakdown. One way to alleviate overcrowding it to teach the inmates self-control through the practice of yoga. Not only does it theoretically prepare them for society, but they can earn 15 days off their sentences for every three months of participation.
5. Join the Military
This was common in America up until the 70s, when it was eradicated. By joining the armed forces, criminals could have their charges dropped and learn to be men at the same time. While the Marines, Army, and Air Force now forbid it, the Nave still makes exceptions.
This is another method of release that can be taken advantage of if you go to prison in Brazil. All the inmate has to do is choose a book to read from a select list and write a book report on what they read. For twelve completed reports they can get up to 48 days knocked off of their time.
7. Build a Train for the Czar
At one time they were building a railway for the Russian czar, but terrible conditions served to do in the workers. Finally, they had prisoners begin working on the project if they had minor crimes, and they could earn two days off for every day they worked.
In Milwaukee, Wisconsin, USA they allow inmates to clean up hazardous bodily waste, thereby avoiding the high cost of professional HAZMAT workers. Inmates can earn one hour off their time per job. The highest time off earned was thirteen days, followed by eleven.
9. Old Age
This probably isn’t the best option, unless you get a life sentence. Because of rising health care costs for the elderly, anyone who has completed either 75% of their sentence, or ten years, and is 65-years of age or older, can apply for an early release.
10. Koran Memorization
The Gaza Strip will allow prisoners to memorize the Koran, the holy book of Islam, in an effort to get their time reduced. If they memorize five chapters of the Koran they can have up to a year taken off of their sentence and, according to Muslims, improve their lives in the process.